So from what I have learned from TMZ the stupid cast of Jersey Shore is demanding more than 10 grand AN EPISODE. Seriously? A. they are not even funny and B. they are a poor pathetic excuse for humans. Who actually does that kind of stuff? As a parent I would be ashamed if my child acted like such especially on television for everyone to see.
I think, instead MTV should just give Nicky and I our own show. I mean we have plenty of drama. Tons of jokes. And I like to think we're not too hard on the eyes. Not to mention we are REAL. We don't spend tons of money on hair gel or refer to ourselves as prayin mantis's for God's sake. We're just two normal kids from a normal suburban neighborhood tryin to make our way through this world. And we're so broke that we're willin to settle for 1, 000 dollars per episode. so check out our cool little poll riiighhhttt ----->
over there. and let us know if you agree that we should have a show.
(the answer is YES by the way!)
xox-Sondraaaa!!
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Ohhh facebook.
Status: Joe is getting ready too go to class for three hours, FML!!!!
Nicky
that to..has TOO many O's. So ya know
Cassondra
you made a mistake when you decided to welcome nicky in to your life with open arms.
Nicky Yes, most make that mistake...then they wished they would have welcomed me with a taser and a bullet proof vest.
Cassondra
I'd go a lot heavier than a tazer for one.
Nicky
I was going to say heavy artillery but I didn't want to sound too dangerous. I mean my god...I'm not Hitler.
Joe It's ok, i think i will live! You can bark all ya want, but till ya bite i will still be there with open arms..!!!
Nicky
I don't bite...there's all those chances of disease and what not. I'm not taking any chances sir. But i'm happy you are accepting me, because I understand that I can be a complete smartass and verbally rip people apart with my large vocabulary and my amazing capability to use said vocabulary in battles of wit. I will work on modesty next.
Cassondra
She needs to work on people skills but if modesty is next then so be it.
Nicky
My people skills are impecable, not only am I completely blunt about how i feel I can slo put it in a way that makes people feel so verbally abused and offended that they are ashamed to be who they are. Where is the bad in that?
Joe
That they are nicky, that they are!!! if you like verbally cutting people into small bite size pieces... but if you cant like people for who they are then you shouldnt like them in the first place an you nicky, well ur ahhh ur just you... i like you the way you are you are a great friend too cassondra an i hope someday a great friend of mine.
Nicky
Woh Sondra changed her name...who knew. And your damn right they should not have a problem with it. But in all reality I am a very nice person I only use my wit for good, unless it is an extreme case where i must defend my honor or honor of others. I'm practically innocent if you think about it. Defending the weak and attacking the stupid. All in good fun and it's totally kosher. Swear to you mane.
Joe I know an thats what i like about cha... always keeping me on my toe's
Cassondra
If half of the people you talked to on a daily basis had half a clue as to what you were saying or the large amount of sarcasm that is hidden behin your words I think that they would describe your social skills as distasteful and somewhat offensive. Compelling to me however because I can see through all of the bullshit that is projected from your mouth dear sweet nicole.
Nicky
Yes this is a very valid point. Because even though i may come off as sweet and innocent, if you read between the lines I am bashing on you in ways you couldn't even grasp without a dictionary and probably the rest of the chromosomes you were born without. Fact of the matter is my dry sense of humor is one of the many things I love about myself. ... See MoreBut if you are an easy target then you bring it upon yourself. And if you are a slutty no good whore who puts out and acts dumb then for god sakes you just deserve a little constructive critisism from me. Im just here to help out for the greater good.
Cassondra
Sounds as if you have a little resenment to a no good whore somewhere out there haha none the less I love you nicky. Cunt or not.
Nicky
I cannot believe you just called me a cunt....
Nicky
that to..has TOO many O's. So ya know
Cassondra
you made a mistake when you decided to welcome nicky in to your life with open arms.
Nicky Yes, most make that mistake...then they wished they would have welcomed me with a taser and a bullet proof vest.
Cassondra
I'd go a lot heavier than a tazer for one.
Nicky
I was going to say heavy artillery but I didn't want to sound too dangerous. I mean my god...I'm not Hitler.
Joe It's ok, i think i will live! You can bark all ya want, but till ya bite i will still be there with open arms..!!!
Nicky
I don't bite...there's all those chances of disease and what not. I'm not taking any chances sir. But i'm happy you are accepting me, because I understand that I can be a complete smartass and verbally rip people apart with my large vocabulary and my amazing capability to use said vocabulary in battles of wit. I will work on modesty next.
Cassondra
She needs to work on people skills but if modesty is next then so be it.
Nicky
My people skills are impecable, not only am I completely blunt about how i feel I can slo put it in a way that makes people feel so verbally abused and offended that they are ashamed to be who they are. Where is the bad in that?
Joe
That they are nicky, that they are!!! if you like verbally cutting people into small bite size pieces... but if you cant like people for who they are then you shouldnt like them in the first place an you nicky, well ur ahhh ur just you... i like you the way you are you are a great friend too cassondra an i hope someday a great friend of mine.
Nicky
Woh Sondra changed her name...who knew. And your damn right they should not have a problem with it. But in all reality I am a very nice person I only use my wit for good, unless it is an extreme case where i must defend my honor or honor of others. I'm practically innocent if you think about it. Defending the weak and attacking the stupid. All in good fun and it's totally kosher. Swear to you mane.
Joe I know an thats what i like about cha... always keeping me on my toe's
Cassondra
If half of the people you talked to on a daily basis had half a clue as to what you were saying or the large amount of sarcasm that is hidden behin your words I think that they would describe your social skills as distasteful and somewhat offensive. Compelling to me however because I can see through all of the bullshit that is projected from your mouth dear sweet nicole.
Nicky
Yes this is a very valid point. Because even though i may come off as sweet and innocent, if you read between the lines I am bashing on you in ways you couldn't even grasp without a dictionary and probably the rest of the chromosomes you were born without. Fact of the matter is my dry sense of humor is one of the many things I love about myself. ... See MoreBut if you are an easy target then you bring it upon yourself. And if you are a slutty no good whore who puts out and acts dumb then for god sakes you just deserve a little constructive critisism from me. Im just here to help out for the greater good.
Cassondra
Sounds as if you have a little resenment to a no good whore somewhere out there haha none the less I love you nicky. Cunt or not.
Nicky
I cannot believe you just called me a cunt....
In regards to the "Taco Bell Diet"
Well first off, this woman is naturally that thin or works out a lot. She was not at any point in her life 100 pounds over weight requiring her to go feast on Taco Bell to lose the poundage. There is no way in hell that Taco Bell will get you into shape or help you lose any weight. That is just ridiculous. If you are going to a drive thru to lose weight you need to quickly reevaluate the direction in which you are choosing to live you life. Regardless, without diet and excersie you aren't going to drop the pounds no matter what. I don't understand why people cannot come to grips with this very obvious fact..we do not live in a perfect world people. No diet pills will not make you lose weight, NO Taco Bell will not make you lose weight, and for fuck sake you cannot do it without you working your fatass out. Are people that dense, time to realize if you do not excersise your multiple rolls which you probably refer to them as your "lovely lady lumps" will not go anywhere. And just because Fergie said they were lovely doesn't mean any of us agree. Good luck with your weight loss endevures...and stay the FUCK out of the drive-thrus.
Random
Sondra: In response to our blood donation and supposedly saving the lives of not one but six human beings i feel the need to remind you of the blatantly obvious facts. The fist one being my blood is completely useless in every way shape and form. Because of the mass amounts of liquor I drink I'm sure it's tainted and the fact that at some point in my life i have done drugs. And we all know that shit stays in your system for like 7 years or some odd number like that. So if they could at all salvage something out of my pint bag the chances are that there was not enough to even save the smallest bay-bay. Now i feel worse about my lack of commitment towards saving lives. My dream of ever being a super hero were just demolished by the new found epiphany.
Now next order of business, I'm going on a date with you know who and I'm actually kind of excited that we are actually going to go out and do something that does not involve five minutes of pointless conversation and then proceeding to fuck like rabbits for next 2 hours. Yes, it is a great work out but my god you can only take so much of that before you get bored or are in too much pain to even find the smallest amount of pleasure from it. I mean sex is good, but only in small amounts and for an average amount of time. Like 45 minutes, anything past that and it's obvious you are both faking the enjoyment and for the ladies...you are uncomfortable for the next few days. To all the guys out there...our vagina cannot take long periods of time being pounded into. Take the hint...we are faking!
Now moving past that, about the Tyra thing. I am not a a fan of her at all. She is old news, washed up and in all reality has thunder thighs. But the thing that really gets me is the fact that she wants to be Oprah so bad. Sorry Tyra it's never going to happen, why do you ask? Because Oprah actually discusses things that have some type of importance Tyra discusses things like "My 16 year old daughter is addicted to make-up." The mother looked like a fucking porn star, it's not like the apple falls that far from the tree. But yeah that's my view on Tyra bitch is going nowhere but down...she peaked and is in denial about it.
Now next order of business, I'm going on a date with you know who and I'm actually kind of excited that we are actually going to go out and do something that does not involve five minutes of pointless conversation and then proceeding to fuck like rabbits for next 2 hours. Yes, it is a great work out but my god you can only take so much of that before you get bored or are in too much pain to even find the smallest amount of pleasure from it. I mean sex is good, but only in small amounts and for an average amount of time. Like 45 minutes, anything past that and it's obvious you are both faking the enjoyment and for the ladies...you are uncomfortable for the next few days. To all the guys out there...our vagina cannot take long periods of time being pounded into. Take the hint...we are faking!
Now moving past that, about the Tyra thing. I am not a a fan of her at all. She is old news, washed up and in all reality has thunder thighs. But the thing that really gets me is the fact that she wants to be Oprah so bad. Sorry Tyra it's never going to happen, why do you ask? Because Oprah actually discusses things that have some type of importance Tyra discusses things like "My 16 year old daughter is addicted to make-up." The mother looked like a fucking porn star, it's not like the apple falls that far from the tree. But yeah that's my view on Tyra bitch is going nowhere but down...she peaked and is in denial about it.
GOSSIP.
Blah- As much as I do NOT like Tyra Banks I would actually like to say she's not completely off her rocker. So after like 10 ridiculous seasons of watchin girls who don't get enough food to eat fight over the title of "america's next top model" Tyra is going to be having a "plus size" version of the show. Which really excites me. I'm not really sure why because I'm like 100 lbs soaking wet but really, I'm sick of seeing these nasty skinny girls who would cry if you threw a burger at them. So woo-hoo to all the beautiful plus sized beauties out there. work it girl!!
WHICH REMINDS ME- I still haven't found my diva-licious gay friend yet. I really need one of those. Like Perez Hilton but a little more glam and not so diva. (If this is you- apply within)
In more news....Wait... maybe I should just say that recently I've become obsessed with TMZ. Maybe because my poor pathetic life only consists of school work sleep my boyfriend and all of my psycho ex's. So that said, I need some kind of excitment in my life.
Right, so anyways, everyone and their mother knows that the st. louis rams (who?) suck ass. They're worthless and we should just trade them in for a basketball team instead. But now..to make matters even worse some douche idiot Steven Jackson (who plays for the rams if you didn't know) is being sued by his baby momma for apparently beating her and throwing her around when she was 9 Months pregnant. Scum from the Bottom of the Earth I tell you. I hope that poor girl and her baby are okay and I hope they send this tool back to wherever the fuck he came from and then decide that the rams are a horrible asset to st. louis :D
You know- I think I have a new hero too. Chelsea Handler (from the Chelsea Lately show)... Thats going to be Nicky and I in 6 months. severly hated but funny none the less.
WHICH REMINDS ME- I still haven't found my diva-licious gay friend yet. I really need one of those. Like Perez Hilton but a little more glam and not so diva. (If this is you- apply within)
In more news....Wait... maybe I should just say that recently I've become obsessed with TMZ. Maybe because my poor pathetic life only consists of school work sleep my boyfriend and all of my psycho ex's. So that said, I need some kind of excitment in my life.
Right, so anyways, everyone and their mother knows that the st. louis rams (who?) suck ass. They're worthless and we should just trade them in for a basketball team instead. But now..to make matters even worse some douche idiot Steven Jackson (who plays for the rams if you didn't know) is being sued by his baby momma for apparently beating her and throwing her around when she was 9 Months pregnant. Scum from the Bottom of the Earth I tell you. I hope that poor girl and her baby are okay and I hope they send this tool back to wherever the fuck he came from and then decide that the rams are a horrible asset to st. louis :D
You know- I think I have a new hero too. Chelsea Handler (from the Chelsea Lately show)... Thats going to be Nicky and I in 6 months. severly hated but funny none the less.
More Rambling
Your kitten video reminded me that everytime you masterbate god kills a baby kitten. Like, why the kittens? Why couldn't he kill a baby sloth everytime. Noone really thinks they are cute. Or at least noone should!
Anyways, onward.
Nicky- in response to us never having, like, given a kidney or anything let me remind you that we did indeed give blood once. That few pints of blood saved at least three lives and with both of us combined WE SAVED SIX LIVES. The people who donate a kidney are only merely saving ONE life. So I would like to think we did our part in the world. Right?
Also, I was thinking, we may be a bit crude and a little blunt but really...who is going to say this shit if we don't? For the rest of Exhibit A's life he's going to be running around in biker shorts or whatever those were thinkin that he's hot shit and girls find that attractive. And for god's sake Jessica- something had to be said! Seriously, she is just lookin for a slap in the face.
So now that that is out of the way I would just like to give a standing O (FYI I'm still sitting) to all the fat douche bags who think that this fucking TACO BELL DIET is going to shed off the probably 150 pounds that they could spare from their body. First of all- it's called a drive thru diet. You're not going to lose ANYTHING if you're driving everywhere. Here's a thought get off your lazy ass and WALK to taco bell and then maybbeeee you would lose a few pounds. MAYBE. Also I would like everyone to know that as I was getting myself taco bell in the mall today a rather large man decided to do the drive thru diet via the food court and ordered himself four of those puny little taco things with the tomatoes and two regular soft tacos. You're not losing anything except your chances of getting a girlfriend and all of your arteries by buying SIX FUCKING TACOS. Thank you God for good genes.
Thats all :D have a lovely day world
xox- sondraaaa
Anyways, onward.
Nicky- in response to us never having, like, given a kidney or anything let me remind you that we did indeed give blood once. That few pints of blood saved at least three lives and with both of us combined WE SAVED SIX LIVES. The people who donate a kidney are only merely saving ONE life. So I would like to think we did our part in the world. Right?
Also, I was thinking, we may be a bit crude and a little blunt but really...who is going to say this shit if we don't? For the rest of Exhibit A's life he's going to be running around in biker shorts or whatever those were thinkin that he's hot shit and girls find that attractive. And for god's sake Jessica- something had to be said! Seriously, she is just lookin for a slap in the face.
So now that that is out of the way I would just like to give a standing O (FYI I'm still sitting) to all the fat douche bags who think that this fucking TACO BELL DIET is going to shed off the probably 150 pounds that they could spare from their body. First of all- it's called a drive thru diet. You're not going to lose ANYTHING if you're driving everywhere. Here's a thought get off your lazy ass and WALK to taco bell and then maybbeeee you would lose a few pounds. MAYBE. Also I would like everyone to know that as I was getting myself taco bell in the mall today a rather large man decided to do the drive thru diet via the food court and ordered himself four of those puny little taco things with the tomatoes and two regular soft tacos. You're not losing anything except your chances of getting a girlfriend and all of your arteries by buying SIX FUCKING TACOS. Thank you God for good genes.
Thats all :D have a lovely day world
xox- sondraaaa
A little bit more to say..
So i understand that we do not have a typical blog. You know the ones that are about people's adventure stories and their kids and what not. That's understandable because that's not what we are here to do at all. I am not here to inspire you with any stories about my life, no I have never saved anyone or like given a kidney or anything. All i really have going for me is a very dry sense of humor and the fact that i lucked out and was able to somehow be able to be damn good at photography. All that really shows me is that god wasn't COMPLETELY kidding when he decided to throw me onto this no-good planet. But besides the point... I don't want people to look at this and just think we are catty and are bashing people for no apparent reason because that's not it all. There is probable reasoning for people to make there way on here and it's not insignificant I can promise you that. But regardless if you just take the time and read what we have to say you will find your self on the floor, in fetal position, grasping for air because you are laughing so hard. Yes we are that funny. Now enjoy this video about kittens.
Well if we are talking about heros..
If we are choosing to talk about our hero's then I will humbly oblige. Mine is a bit our of character as far as hero's come and I am proud to add him to our new little blog here. Tucker Max, yes i understand the fact that it is probably completely cliche in every way for him to be my hero. Yes, I understand that he is probably a new found hero of tons of people by now and I am not showing one bit of individuality by conforming to the new found craze that is this book. BUT... I really could give a shit less, why do you ask? Well probably because I have never laughed so hard in places while reading it and gotten so many blank curious stares from random people while reading any other book. I have been kicked out of class multiple times because my laughter is a disruption and "I should be ashamed of myself for reading such garbage. " People who think like that toward the god that is Tucker Max should personally ram their heads into the keyboard. Because little did you know, that makes you a close-minded, morality based, and all around sadistic person. Just saying. Anyway it's a great book, look into it if you pull your head out of your ass long enough to read the first sentence then you can grasp the hilarity for yourself.
**Nicky**
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